As I continue reading Strengthening the Soul of your Leadership and the book of Exodus, I have been challenged in the area of time.  The one thing I cannot buy at Target.  My time is my most precious commodity.  It is why I get upset when my kids make a mess of something I have just cleaned (it will take MORE time for someone to clean it again).  It is why I hate my dog (how many times does one animal need to go outside?).  Feeling pressed for time is why I don’t like anything unexpected in my day and why honestly I have been so crabby lately.  Although I am grateful for an opportunity to be made aware of this problem what am I supposed to do about it?  What can I cut out?  Sell the dog?  Quit my job?  Oh and there is that looming grad class I have to register for.  Ugh.

“Be still and know that I am God.”  Another Scripture I have on one of my walls.  I am beginning to understand that I am not going to discern quickly or easily how to have a pace that honors the Lord.  I want to have some deep and theological answers about this.  I want an aha moment but sometimes we just have to sit and wait and be okay with no answer (at least for now).  My friend Elizabeth Murphy says you can’t rush through the places God wants to take you (ironic that I want God to hurry up and give me an answer to my time problem).  “Lord, thank you for helping me realize that when I am irritated because the phone is ringing that perhaps my pace is interferring with what you have for me in life.  Thank you that you want me to persevere in figuring out what my days should look like.  Help me to be patient and still long enough to hear your answers in this.  Amen.”