As I blogged several weeks ago, I have been setting aside 10 – 15 minutes every morning before my kids wake up to read my Bible; to pray and ask God to speak to my day, my heart and my life through His Word.  It has been an uplifting, educating and inspiring way to begin my day.., until yesterday.  Yesterday I was reading Matthew 24 which is all about end times.  The entire chapter is about how awful the pain and suffering of the days preceding Jesus’ return will be.  Pretty much the opposite of uplifting and inspiring but I not only read it, I read it twice.  For whatever reason there was a verse that was particularly troubling to me. Matthew 24:29 reads: “Immediately after the distress of those days” ‘the sun will be darkened, and the moon will not give its light; the stars will fall from the sky, and the heavenly bodies will be shaken.’  I live in Wisconsin.  Sometimes the sun shining is the only thing that keeps me from just hanging it all up and crawling into a hole.  The sun Lord?  Total darkness?  Hell on earth without any light?
After I read chapter 24 I closed my Bible and began preparing for my Soul Sisters to come over for our weekly pow-wow.  The heaviness of chapter 24 was on my heart as I wiped down my counters and made coffee.  Finally, I just asked the Lord to help me see Matthew 24 through his lens.  To help rid my heart and mind of that nagging fear.  I mean honestly, chapter 24 makes you wonder if you want to follow Jesus if that is your fate. So I begged Him to remove my doubt and anxiety because I was unable to apparently on my own.
After the girls got to my house one of my friends had us read several verses in the book of Isaiah about fear (of course, right?).   We all took turns reading these verses Nancy had wanted to share with us and this was the first verse I was assigned to read out loud: “The sun will no more be your light by day, nor will the brightness of the moon shine on you, for the Lord will be your everlasting light, and your God will be your glory.”  Then, just in case I didn’t hear it right the first time the next verse reads, “Your sun will never set again, your moon will wane no more; the Lord will be your everlasting light, and your days of sorrow will end” (Isaiah 60:19-20).  I couldn’t get through reading it without tearing up. 
If you ever doubt friends that the God of the universe does not care about you and about every detail of your thought life, heart, fears, doubts and relationships, you must think again.  When we accept his words and store up his commands within us and look for wisdom and understanding as if looking for hidden treasure (Prov. 2:1-4) He meets us there.  If you haven’t felt God telling YOU directly lately that He loves YOU, I hope you will pray about that.  I hope you will ask the Lord to show you and remind you that you matter to Him.  Then I hope you will wait, watch and listen.  I downloaded a song on my Ipad yesterday and when it didn’t appear in Itunes instantly I figured something didn’t connect properly.  In an age where two seconds is too long to wait, I pray you can wait patiently on the Lord and while you are waiting truly look, listen and watch.  I believe He wants us to experience how much He cares about us but I know I’m usually moving too quickly to take the time to see.  But not yesterday.  Yesterday I heard Him, felt Him and sensed His love undeniably and it blew me away.