I have been trying to figure out how to market a boring Bible study I am going to be leading next month.  If there is something I try to be especially when it comes to my faith and belief in God, it’s honest.  As much as I want to have women learn about the overview, geography, time frames and eras of the Bible so they can hear and understand the “content” of God’s Word even better, it’s a little dry.  Here is my ad so far for the bulletin: “Join us in May for a real sleeper.  Participants are guaranteed a good nap or minimally, extensive opportunities for mental wandering.  Bring your Bible and an Americano with 3 shots of expresso.  You’ll need it.”

Although marketing this study is a little tricky, there is something wonderful happening to me as I approach my 45th birthday.  I don’t care.  I don’t care as much about what people think of me.  I don’t care that some people think I’m extreme in my faith.  And I don’t care that a class I’m teaching could be somewhat boring.  It isn’t that I don’t care like a teenage girl with a bad attitude, it’s just that I don’t care if you are bored in my study because I’ve been bored reading the Bible almost my entire life.  If you’ve read my blog for any amount of time you know that over the years I have read the Bible because I know I should, I feel guilty if I don’t or I read it because the rug has been pulled out from under me and I am desperate for help, an answer or a glimmer of hope.  It is not because it is particularly exciting, easy to read or simple to understand.

The main reason I don’t care, however is I believe unabashedly in evolution.  Not evolution like I came from an ape (though I do have freakishly long arms…), but the fact that a meaningful faith in Jesus Christ that matters when I need it, sustains me in hard times and has been the foundation of my life despite episodes of severe boredom, extreme doubt and uncontrolled anger with my faith – generally evolves.  Very few people I meet who have a real love for God beyond just attending church on Sundays have had their faith catapulted or their love for Jesus magnified overnight.  The entire trajectory of my life, parenting, marriage and career have been directly impacted by reading that Book for the past seventeen years whether I felt like it, thought I got something from it or wanted to. My faith has evolved very slowly overtime because I have forced myself to practice the discipline of being in God’s Word as often as I can. So the reason I don’t care if women are bored in my class or even sleep through parts of it is because I genuinely believe that being on a slow, boring journey of an evolving faith is still better than remaining an ape.

“Dear Lord, thank you that your love letter to mankind exists.  Thank you that it is not always easy, comfortable or desirable many times.  Thank you that you did not give up on my evolution over the past 17 years.  It has been a slow, arduous and ugly journey transforming me slowly from a scared, mindless, caged “primate” to a peace-filled, edified and free woman in Jesus Christ.  Please bring women who are willing to be bored to this Bible study.  I know you will do your work with anyone who is faithful enough to try.  Thank you for loving us enough to never leave any of us the same and thank you for the transforming power of Your Word. In Your Name, Amen.”